couple carrying big cardboard box at new home

Should a couple live together before getting hitched?

September 21, 2017
  • Absolutely
  • No, it’s not necessary
  • I’m not sure

Hitching the knot! A momentous event we all daydream about, punctuated by bouquets, flowing gowns, and endless streams of Uncle Bob’s questionable dance moves. But before we hear the harmonious notes of the wedding march, there’s an all-important question that lurks in the recesses of many minds: Should a couple live together before making it official?

couple carrying a box outside their hous from the truck

1. Absolutely

Let’s begin by diving into the compelling reasons why one might shout, “Absolutely!” to this question. The classic movie, “When Harry Met Sally,” taught us that understanding each other’s quirks (like ordering food in a very particular way) is paramount. Living together can indeed be a dry run of what’s to come. You learn about their snoring habits, discover that the way they squeeze toothpaste is potentially grounds for a small domestic dispute, and that they have an inexplicable obsession with collecting rubber ducks.

A survey showed that couples who lived together before tying the knot felt more prepared for the inevitable hiccups of married life. Sharing a living space could unveil compatibility in dealing with finances, chores, and decision-making.

couple kissing good bye on the street

2. No, it’s not necessary

On the flip side, there are those who firmly believe, “No, it’s not necessary.” Perhaps they channel Jane Austen’s traditional romantic notions where couples kept a respectful distance until the dashing Mr. Darcy declared his undying love in the rain. These individuals argue that mystery and individual growth are integral to a relationship. There’s something delightful about embarking on the shared journey of cohabitation post-marriage, almost like unwrapping a present you’ve been gazing at for the longest time.

Furthermore, remember the allure of the hit song “At Last” by Etta James? That sweet anticipation of finally coming home to your partner after being wed can be a feeling worth waiting for. Not to mention, for some, there’s a deep-rooted cultural or religious belief that supports this decision.

3. I’m not sure

Then there’s the ever-popular, “I’m not sure.” Indecision isn’t necessarily a bad thing; it might be a sign of careful contemplation. Some of us remember Ross from “Friends,” who maybe should have been a bit more unsure before jumping into some of his life decisions. A pinch of hesitance allows couples to evaluate their unique relationship dynamics, needs, and aspirations.

One interesting tidbit: A survey found that a surprising number of couples fall into this category, often juggling societal expectations, personal beliefs, and the myriad of advice from loved ones. And let’s not even get started on those well-meaning but intensely nosy neighbors!

happy couple painting the wall

Fun Curiosities to Ponder

  1. Did you know that the number of U.S. adults who’ve ever lived with an unmarried partner has surpassed those who’ve ever been married?
  2. Historically speaking, cohabitation before marriage was once a rare phenomenon, but it’s now seen as a rite of passage for many young adults.
  3. Shakespeare, in his infinite wisdom, never did give us a straight answer about cohabitation. But between the lines of Romeo and Juliet’s passionate love story, one could argue they might have benefited from a few trial nights of balcony sleepovers.
happy couple painting the wall in the apartment

Charting Your Unique Love Story

In the grand tapestry of love and commitment, whether or not to live together before marriage is but one thread. While you ponder the beats of Beyonce’s “Single Ladies” or hum to the sweet melodies of Frank Sinatra’s “Love and Marriage,” remember that every couple’s rhythm is unique. Whether you lean towards an “Absolutely”, “No, it’s not necessary”, or find yourself shrugging with an “I’m not sure”, one thing’s for sure: the path you choose will be as unique and special as your love story.

In the ever-evolving narrative of romance, the chapter on whether or not to cohabitate before marriage is one that’s both personal and profound. As you find yourself nodding to the beats of Beyonce’s “Single Ladies” or reminiscing with Frank Sinatra’s “Love and Marriage”, it’s essential to remember that each love story, like a snowflake, is distinctly unique.

But here’s the fun part: we want to hear from YOU! Dive in, vote in this poll, and let’s unravel the mysteries of modern relationships together. Perhaps your decision is influenced by a sassy grandma, a college roommate’s tale, or that rom-com you watched last Friday night. Whatever your reasons, they matter and add to the rich tapestry of opinions on this topic.

And once you’ve cast your vote, don’t scuttle away like Cinderella at midnight! Stick around, share your thoughts in the comments, and enjoy the revelatory statistics that unfold. After all, what’s more fun than comparing your choice with the rest of the nation’s lovebirds?

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