Father and son sitting on a bridge

Is your parent(s) also your friend?

January 30, 2018
  • Yes, we talk about everything
  • No and that’s okay
  • No and I wish we were

Psychologists believe that the primary task of parents is to become the authority for their child. And this is impossible without friendly relations. The ability to listen truly is one of the main ways of establishing a mutual understanding between parents and children. 

Do you remember when you last listened to what your child tells you? It does not matter what it is: it can be any domestic problem or a quarrel with a friend because of the toy that could not be divided. Becoming a friend for your child means to listen, and most importantly – to hear them. If your child doesn’t do the right thing, do not hurry to scold and punish it: try to talk calmly and find out about the situation. After all, if a child tells you the truth, then it sees you as a close person whose help and advice can always be counted on. 

And another way around, in the absence of dialogue, in case of punishment, the next time the child would decide to hide from you a problem, and this could lead to even worse problems. In the end, you may lose contact with your child. A child, especially a teenager, is unlikely to raise questions straightforwardly, directly. Only carefully listening to their stories you can draw the right conclusions and, if necessary, correct the opinion, the frame of reference of the child. 

For example, being a friend to your child, you can protect the teenager from communicating with a bad company. For this, you need to have a sincere interest in their hobbies, not ignore the child’s opinion. A gross misconception of adults, in this case, is the satisfaction with a short reply “OK” to the question “how are you?”. To be friends with your child and trust each other, you need to be interested in the details of the life of your child, to demonstrate wisdom and tact. Then, when they reach adolescence, you will not have to think about how to break the wall between you and the child, how to become a friend to them. And your most dear person will appreciate you, seek help, consider your the best friend. 

So, can you call yourself a friend of your children?


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